This looks like a lot to read because of the narrow margins, but you should be able to knock it out in about 2-3 minutes. Most days this will just have information about life in the hospital or other things that are going on with Ethan. Today I blogged my heart out.
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Wow. It seems like only yesterday that we arrived here. After that statement, this one might not make much sense. But Ethan’s birthday (12-05-06) seems like 2 years ago. Those two thoughts have been running through my mind a lot lately. I have been thinking about the concept of “time”, and what I have been spending so much of my “spare time” on while here. Any time I have left in the day is spent on this: prayer & reading, the website, the phone, the guestbook, email, the chatroom, the REAL Mail (our personal favorite).
Just eight weeks ago, I spent my time worrying about having enough money to pay the bills and now I could care less. The bills will get paid. I never realized how silly it all was. I would rather sell everything I have for just one more day with Ethan. The best part is that one day, he will walk out of this place and we will have an understanding of what it truly means to appreciate every moment. Don’t get me wrong… I cherished every moment with him before. Anyone that knows me well would tell you… since Ethan was born, I have talked about nothing else. But this is different in that I am not concerned about the petty things like, “will he grow up to play football”, or “will the other kids in school like him”. Now I have one primary thing on my mind… “when he gets older, will he truly appreciate the second chance that God will soon grant him”. I believe he will. And the neat thing is that he can be in almost any situation and serve a greater purpose.
I am learning that God can use anyone to spread his message, and in many cases we don’t even have to go anywhere. For example… the sweet lady that send us cards every week, or the wonderful family that send a couple emails every few days, or the nurse that takes the extra minute or two to get to know us, or the lady that posts Ethan’s pictures on her billboards, or the person that spreads the prayer chain to their entire address book. I believe the hardest part for people in my generation is to be content no matter what situation we are in. We have become accustomed to instant gratification. Its so easy to volunteer for something and give 100% for one day only to give up because it just wasn’t what we expected. I know I have made that mistake before. My intentions were pure, but I was SEEKING a purpose rather than helping someone meet a need. Although I have been part of some pretty amazing things… for once in my life, I am able to feel like I am part of a much bigger plan. It comes at a high price, but in retrospect I can see how God has prepared me for this moment. I would be a fool to waste this opportunity to serve. I would be a fool to sit around and cry all day and say “why me Lord? why me? what have I done?” This is an opportunity not an obstacle. Please be encouraged that today can be your day! YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE FROM WHERE YOU ARE SITTING RIGHT NOW WITHOUT LEAVING YOUR CHAIR. Don’t be intimidated by your Bible! The above concept is just Phillipians 4:10-13, and as a matter of fact Paul’s letter is much shorter than mine. 
Be a servant. Keep your eyes open for an opportunity. While you are praying for a purpose, there is always someone else praying for a need to be met. Chances are… you are sitting right next to them.
YES! PRAYER STILL WORKS!!!
You are a very, very wise man with alot of faith and wisdom. Ethan is a very lucky boy to be able to grow up with a dad like you!
((hugs))
Jeanne
I praise God for the wisdom and peace you have. I only wish I were as strong. You have taught me so much and I thank you.
Jon Mark
The trials of your family have touched me deeply. I look at my 7 month old son and cry with gratitude that I am not being tested at this time. (Knowing all the while that there is no way to tell the future). Heartflet prayers are being said for Ethan from myself, my family and friends. Ethans link makes it so much easier to keep him on the top of the priority list. Gods blessing on you all.
Your post is beautiful! I didnt feel the way you do until Gavins second heart surgery. Sitting in the waiting room with grieving people. At that very instance I realized it is time to do something. Get up and pray with them, love them, encourage them. Starting a website touches more people then we will ever know. God bless you and your precious little boy!!!
-The Kuykendall Family
Ben,
Jesus lives in people. Here, and following along at Ethan’s site since Valentines, I have seen Jesus living in you in the words you write. God works through people and you and your family have helped to rely on my faith in the Lord by putting prayer first in my life. Before I do anything I pray for little Ethan and your family, and lift our Lord up in words of adoration and thanksgiving and I have been shown so many things in this prayer time. I’ve come to rely on God for little Ethan several times a day, but its branched off into my own life as well. Thank you for allowing your light to shine through you. You and Becky will raise a wonderful, God loving boy up into a man who lives for God. God Bless you. PRAYER WORKS!
~Tammy (YT Tiger)
Ben, Thank you for your beautiful words of wisdom to all of us! I KNOW that prayer works and have seen God heal a baby with life threatening heart problems just recently. This child’s cardiologist said that he “couldn’t believe he was looking at the same baby” at her last appointment but we all know that God healed her and He can heal Ethan as well! Prayer does work and thank you for using your difficult situation to show that to many people. We are continuing to remember your family, and specifically Ethan, in our prayers. If there is anything we can do to “be a servant” to your family please let us know! -Jennifer (HU c/o 98), Phillip, Melina, Ella and Ava
P.S. We were told we would have a very hard time having children and we now have three, a four year old and 22 month old twins, after asking for prayers to increase our family.